What the Hell?!

Though silly, I felt (&still feel it right now) amazed and rather pathetic - I learnt about a "good" friend's result through another friend of mine.
Thanks for putting me on the chopping board again.

(I have no idea what's wrong with you and what I've done to you to deserve all this fucked up attitude and shit.)

PS: I freaking hate this.



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*edited.

It used to be me. But why is this no longer happening? I have a million things in my mind. I have a million things I wanna ask. But.I.Just.Don't.Have.The.Courage.To.Do.So.
He WAS right, I'm so scared of you. So scared of getting on the wrong nerve. And now that I've offended you; I'm so confused, I don't know what to do. All these while, all the things we've done and went through. Did they just vanished? Did they not mean a single thing to you? :/
Maybe this was how he actually felt when everything suddenly just crumbled.
Uncontrolled tears... Uncontrolled train of thoughts; continuously interupting his sleep.
Though this ain't as serious, I am still affected by it by.this.much. I wanna talk to you but I know what I'll get. "No point" it's been coming up to my mind. What to do? I don't know.

Please, spare me this agony...

PS: "I don't care." That's just a lie.