A Little Bit Stupid.

Just as the title suggested, I'm going to be a little bit stupid.

Major project finally ended today.

Did not do very well, and is considered one of my worst so far, but what the hell? It's over.

Sigh. I think 2011 is going to be a tough year for my emotions. It keeps going on rough roller coaster rides that calls for tears and sorrows... Hopefully, it's only going to occur during the first quarter of the year, because it's too much to handle.
No matter what, all these negativities have to go. So please, pardon my rants... Else, just don't read them. (:


No matter how much I repeat this to myself, I still find myself falling into the pitch black pit of "trying".
I've experienced the change, the difference. But I hoped it was me being paranoid, I thought I look too deep into things.
That day, you showed me a huge difference in reaction, you showed me your clear bias. This day, I realise the hopeless chance to salvage what's lost. Even bidding farewell looks challenging for you. I'm upset that you couldn't separate the issues and that things have to end up the way they are going. Since it's coming to an end, I guess it'll be easier from now on.

What to do? This is life, right? :\

In general,,,

I think humans shouldn't be given the ability to talk big or the ability to make promises easily.
Why? Because it's cruel to the other person who's believing the big talks and promises.

说到 就要 做到.

Please, I'm not pin-pointing on anyone. Just in general, because a few situations have led me to recall more incidents.

Having to live so long, I still have the tendency to get excited and hopeful for the slightest things. And trust me, I've been lied to, let down and bailed out almost a million times. Of which, my mother's actually the culprit for most disappointments when I was young. :\

That aside, I'm just trying to say, I don't understand why people can't stick to their words. Not all, but most, I guess? What is so difficult in executing your says, your promises? Why speak of things you aren't 100% confident you can do? If you talked big because you had the confident, then why the inability to do them? Why make promises you're unsure you can really keep up to? Else, why break the promise you once thought you could keep? If it's a long run promise, don't make it. 

The things said and promised may be really important to another person, it may be something they'll end up remembering for a very long time... 

Maybe, the second thing I cannot tolerate from a person, after lying, is talking big and making empty promises. I don't like the feeling of being disappointed with someone. It's not sad being disappointed, but it's sad when you try to trust that person all over again like things never happened... :\ It's not entirely easy.

I need to stop believing people's talks and promises.
I need to stop being hopeful.
I need to stop remembering your promise.

To clarify, I'm not angry, pissed, annoyed, irritated or any similar words you can think of, I'm just a little bit very upset and a wee bit frustrated.


This is what you get when an ill and upset person's listening to ballads and having things to settle with a myriad of thoughts.
ps: It feels worse when you don't seem to care.

:) SHINee pleases the eyes and makes me smile.
And now, I've no idea why I typed all that. :\

I'm going to go sing sing sing and sleep the remaining negatives away!!!! :D
shooo shoooo shoooo! ^^