Feelings..

Okie dokie. sister edited this. hahas.
"sisters for life"- of course, we're blood related. -.- LOLs.

i'm so gonna flunk my Phsyics paper1. sighs. so much for not wanting to disappoint our Physics teacher and tutor. ): what's more, i was able to do most of them, except for some calculations, but i didn't have enough time to finish shading the OAS paper. goodness! i should bang my head against the wall. i'll make sure i'll never spend so much time on those calculations. blame it on my poor memory; two or three questions were discussed with our tutor! gosh~

anyway, this paper not only spoiled my mood ehs; it made me determine to work harder!

i don't know what's happening to me. all these new chemical reaction going on inside my brain is making me sick causing me to lose my senses and my great ability to think logically!

seriously, i almost wanted to tear when i was on my way home. too many things in my mind; i should spend an hour or so to sort them out nicely and prioritise them before slowly deleting them from my brain, like a computer. sounds a bit stupid but i realise, there's a tendency for me to lose my temper easily these days. maybe i should push the blame to womens' PMS'. i will only be able to cool down when i'm alone, reflecting on the matter and my reactions before deciding what to do.
YES! i think that's what i'll do. whenever i'm pissed or sad, i shall be alone and get things straight. it's really sickening to be throwing my temper but regreting it later. -.- i feel so irresponsible whenever i do that.

tolerance, it shall be!

really have to apologise to people i've.. hmms.. well, maybe showed a little attitude to yesterday? was worried sick when Yanling didn't contact us because she don't usually come late for class, as in tuitions, and even if she does, she would give us a text or so. but, she didn't yesterday. not only that, the noise level outside was a little driving me nuts- finding myself distracted most of the time makes me feel bootless.

anyway, let's talk about good stuff. after paper today, rushed home yearning for a good sleep but found my house crowded. -.-
i knew my relatives were coming but i didn't expect them to be there early.

the occasion: my youngest uncle was getting MARRIED! hahas. just about an hour or so, they belonged to each other already!

initially, i wasn't really fond of my going-to-be aunt. well, don't say i judge books but their covers. she's not ugly. she just look very... well, i don't know.. somehow very clear what she wants to do after marriage? okok, this should be something good. but, i'm really worried she might use my uncle because the reason for marriage is not so much about the all-so-romantic and all the you-make-my-heart-sink those kindda stuff. it's because it's time for my uncle to get married and maybe because the lady wanted to be a 'PR here?

this might sound ridiculous, the reason is; the bride is not a Singaporean. goodness. now i'm making myself sound as if i'm against people getting married with foreigners. for your information- my second uncle and the youngest one got married with mainland ladies.

i guess it's just normal to have little hinch of negative thoughts about them. i once had some for my second aunt too. but, knowing her better i think she's fun. just a little lazy at first. this shall be the reason for me to let things take it's course with time and nature! lols.
to add in, my grandma seems really uphappy about the lady ehs. when i wanted to take pictures (great phtographer for the day!) for the newly wed and my grandma, there were some signs to it. first, she didn't smile. second, she looked away. -.- so much for wanting her son to get married. (X

a little boring ehs? hahas.
wait a minute! i think i'm struck with some writing juice (Cindy, i really don't know there's a fruit called "writing"!). hahas.

some random, really really random thoughts.

What Exactly Is Marriage To You?

was asked by my English teacher while he was preparing us for O level English Oral. i said things like;
"it's a sweet start for couples to start off their new life story with each other"
"but, number of married couples filing for divorce seems to be tarnishing the good name of marriage"

ya, and stuff like that.
i remembered having a friend asking me: "do you prefer friendship to relationship or vice versa?"
my answer is pretty clear cut ehs? LOLs.
i've always put my friends ahead of other things, except for family, such as career and studies. i remember giving up something somewhat important so as to rush down and accompany my sobbing friend. not very noble yet, but that's what i'll do if that person plays a significant role in my life. anyone wants to create a new noble record for me? hahas.

i really think that marriage nowadays are less 'respected', in the sense that it's not a matter that's being taken seriously. i see young couples getting married and filing for divorce years later; reason behind? because they cannot.. get along well with each other? or maybe because they've finally understood their i-thought-i've-always-understood-you partners.
this may be adults' issue but it usually involves children. -.- it's really saddening for children to be experiencing such stuff they know nothing about.

okok, marriage may or may not be a bad thing la. for example; my parents. they are just like a pair of lovebirds despite having a few tiff. my dad's a good husband despite being pretty egoistic. he likes scolding my mother- like when my mother calls my dad last minute when he's at home already, asking him to fetch her. he would nag for a while (for a very long time actually), say that he wants to rest or he don't want to do it but, a few minutes later; he would leave for his room and get us to call up our mother. lols.
a otherwise case, my mother has a friend who got married and had a child but filed for divorce when the child is 3. reason behind? because she feels that the man don't spend sufficient time with her. to me, the reason's a little silly. but, that's what i meant by getting married even before knowing how it would be like after marriage or even knowing your partner well enough.
on the other hand, we don't get to see our future la. lols.

CONTRADICTIONS! hahas.

not all about what i think la, i can go on. but i think it will not only make my post lengthy (which already is) but will also make it stupid, boring, silly, pointless and everything negative you can list.

What is Love to you then?

a pretty lenghty post. (:
i don't really believe in people saying love at this age ehs? hahas. because one of my friends once told me, for teens 'Love' is a word too vague to describe the infatuations we feel for each other. i believe most of the relationships we're having now are somewhat 'puppy love'. LOLs.

zzzzzzz. i'm gonna do what Cindy did in the evening. have a good rest! (:

goodgood, tomorrow i'm going to AMKs' library to STUDY! yesyesYES! hahas.

Xiaoxuan, sorry la! it's because you always book me tooooooooo late le. hahas. what's more, you really can join us one; it's only that you don't want to okay! :)


bye!
good night~