Saturday, March 28, 2020

Friends? Really?

Adulthood is fucking boring. 

You work, workout (because old age means your metabolism is shit and health is so damn important) and go home to rest. A cycle that just repeats. A meaningless routine that just goes on and on...

On good days, you meet your friends.

This group of friends, that group of friends, and <i>that</i> group of friends.

Friends? Really?

I’m feeling upset today. About something small.

Life has gotten in our way; particularly friendship's way. I have taken a lighter look at this before - how everyone just gets occupied with their own lives and slowly drifts apart from their friends. 

Well, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that.

But, sometimes, it’s just saddening. 

Knowing how a supposedly really good friend knows nothing about what’s happening in your life. Especially when something bad has happened, and they are absolutely clueless about it all, while living their own life. Maybe occupied with their own problems too? It’s just saddening.

Why not just text them?
I don’t know… I find it weird to just suddenly text someone going “Hey… something bad happened at home….” It’s just weird telling that to someone you barely talk to anymore. Even though you still think of each other as great friends.


Friends? Really?


What about me though? Have I spared a thought about them, and about them potentially facing problems of their own? 

No. And that is the saddest thought I have right now.

We were so close. So tight.


So why? 
An excuse I gave myself - Because I hate bad texters, that’s why I stopped taking the initiative. 

It’s annoying and frustrating when you know someone you’re texting is just reading your messages in their notification panel and leaving it there until they want to reply you. It sucks to know you’re not a priority of someone who’s your priority. Geddit?

It’s a terrible excuse, because I know if I were to mention the current situation at home, it won’t be viewed just from the notification panel. It’ll be read and replied to.

But but… Just months of barely having a conversation is just… just...

It’s not like I did not mention though - If nothing has ever been mentioned, yeah, I guess it would have been on me to not have talked about it. But, it was talked about and mentioned again in a group - so if one doesn’t ask further, supposedly someone really close doesn’t ask further, do you really volunteer the information out of nowhere???


Friends? Really?

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