Your dirty little secret.

I've finally found it. Your perfect little secret. -.-
I'm starting to lose trust. Or rather, I'm starting to lose even more trust. I have no idea what to believe of you anymore. Your little white lies to brush me/us off, to make us stop nagging at you or the lies you make to cover up for the lies you've already made to hide/protect what you believe you really want, what you believe you really love.

What do you exactly know about the stupid big word L-O-V-E?!

Loving someone is not always saying/telling the other person: "I Love You".. It's not merely about missing that someone...
You're so affected by this... this... crush that you have.

I really really really hope that you'll get slapped down to the downright earth and wake up. I hope this happen fast.
This is just a phase everyone bound to experience; but you're falling too deep inside. How can we make you understand that... nothing's impossible- especially relationships and feelings and emotions. Do you really believe in forever?! Nothing last forever.

As I've preached- if he really is the one for you, he'll wait. If he really does love you, he'll wait. If he really is so much of a good/devoted guy, he'll wait.
What is the downside of being just friends?

"I wanna hug you",
"I want to ask the same question again, can i bao bao you tomorrow?"
"When are we getting married?";
I don't see friends (you claim) telling each other that...

Am I still supposed to trust you? I'm sick and tired of trying to figure out your mood; and the right time to talk.
People say: "You cannot give up on her, because she's your sister."
Blood really is thicker than water. But, it makes two to tango, makes two to clap. Why do I have to always take the first step?!

People don't understand how tough it is to talk to you. How you always unintentionally show disrespect. You're fifteen but you're still acting like a child. A stubborn child. You should understand more than anyone what I really want is just a simple respect from people. From anyone.
Every time we get to talk; I'll eventually feel pissed off. Not at you; but myself. For not being able to hold my anger. Anger resulted from your unintentional attitudes and your stupid gestures.

Why don't you understand that your feelings and emotions always show on your face?
It's simple; when you're interested, you'll look and respond to whatever we say. But when  you're not, you just get... distracted and pay no respect to the person talking. It's just like when you talk to me; whenever I don't respond or look at you; you'll feel pissed and stop talking. Can't you do the same you expect others to do to you?!



I DON'T WANNA BOTHER ABOUT THIS SHIT ANYMORE.
You can continue lie to us but remember; don't come running when he breaks your heart~ Or when mum finds out about this; don't go crying or throwing tantrum because she cancels/make you deprived of all the other loves of your life.
I'm not cursing; but look- he's still in Secondary school, he'll get to broaden his circle of friends and increase knowledge in future where he'll see and meet even more people, even more girls. People change due to environment too, so what makes you think he's different? What more, how faithful do you think he is? He has told 2 or more girls what he has told you. -.- His relationships shows how much forever never last. I'm not saying he should last long with him.. It's just that, if he can have such a sugar sweet mouth with the girls, you might not be a prob to coax at all.

Just don't let the overwhelming feelings take over your rational.





PS: I'm effing upset, disappointed and pissed.

Your dirty little secret...